August 4. August 25. October 13.........
Insignificant dates to most. Up until my 51st birthday last summer, they were relatively insignificant to me too.
August 4, 2009. The day I learned I had the dreaded "C" word. Cancer.
August 25, 2009. The day I started my battle with my Nemesis.
October 13, 2009. The day I ended my battle and declared victory over my powerful adversary.
The first anniversary of these now forever significant dates is fast approaching. Simultaneously seeming like just yesterday for each of them, and yet like many anniversaries ago they first became part of the rest of my life. Honestly, happily, thankfully, I don't remember a lot of the actual day to day experience of fighting the battles. If I really think about it, I can recall much of the detail, but I expend very little effort transporting back to those days. I do think often of the love and support I received from so many though. I will always gladly expend the energy to remember the many blessings I experienced during those days. Truthfully, it doesn't take much energy...God blessed me far more than I deserved with such loving concern from so many.
I do think about how much life has changed since those milestone dates. Physically, I feel great. Still about 40 pounds lighter than before the journey, but this is now a welcome change as I feel in better physical condition than I have in many years....and I thought I was in fairly decent shape before! My work, the significant travel that is part of my profession, has been handled easily. Ability to taste, produce saliva, sleep...all are well on their way to returning to normal. Sure, a ways to go yet, but all headed in the right direction. Again, blessings so undeserved but greatly appreciated.
I have been fortunate to share in many experiences with family such as hiking half dome and participating again in road bike races. I love my family. Feeling physically strong enough to share in these experiences is such a precious gift. Never again will I take for granted my health.
I still go back to see my doctors once a month. Once I make it to the one year anniversary of defeating my Nemesis, I will advance to bi-monthly visits, and then on the second anniversary, will be deemed to have fully won my battle and won't need to see them anymore. I won't miss seeing them....but I also won't ever forget how they helped me.
A permanent part of my memory will also be the many faces I saw and continue to see while waiting to see my doctors. So many suffering far worse than I ever did, and many recovering so much slower......I know I keep referring to my blessings, but there are just so many. I am so very lucky. Just so very lucky.
You know....I think everyone could benefit from taking a little time regularly to stop, and think about just how blessed we all are.... Glass half full rather than half empty. Its easy to get caught up in thinking about how work is hard, money doesn't go far enough, relationships have too many struggles, all the things we want but don't have.....but not only does dwelling not change any of those realities, we also miss out on so much joy to be derived from recognizing just how much we do have....and should be thankful for. I guarantee there is someone out there who would gladly fill our shoes....exactly as they are...and fell like they had just won life's lottery if they had your life. I know even when I was sick, as soon as I started to think my road was all uphill, it didn't take much of a wandering eye to see someone who was far worse off than me and would have willingly traded me burdens. Focusing on what we do have, what we have been given, is actually quite liberating. Recognizing all that we do have can produce such a positive outlook....and really, that is our reality.
Anyway, life goes on. Amazingly blessed at that. Take a moment to reflect on all that you have and be thankful for it. And be kind to someone today. :)
Ok, time to go hiking with my buddy Tommy. Cute shoes, huh? :) Hope to see you all soon. And thanks again for being there, one of my greatest blessings .
