ahhhhhhhhh, what a day. If all goes as planned, one month from today I have my last treatment. Then recovery, and before I can say "more ribs please", it will be like this never happened. Or at least a memory growing ever distant....
Today is also the first day I found the hair from my head in places other than my head. On my pillow, my bed, the sink and the shower. Doc said I would start losing it right about the time for chemo #2, so she was right on the money. Hope she is as right about the rest of my treatment. A shiny noggin is a small price to pay......
Can't swallow anymore, so its 100% tube feeding now. Kind of a bummer, but the good thing is that I know exactly how many Ensure I need to get to my elusive caloric intake goal. Still trying to dial that in since I lost a little more weight yesterday. Never thought the day would come when I would be anything short of ecstatic to step on a scale and see that I had actually lost a couple pounds. When the nurse weighed me, I kept my shoes on and even tried to keep my blackberry (hey, its half a pound, but she caught me)...... so different from before when I would shed almost everything but my shirt (had to still hide the belly)..... Heck, even as a small, well, better make that "young" boy, going shopping for pants and being directed to the "Husky" section was only the start of my lifelong battle to get that scale to go south, not north. Better add another bottle of ensure to my daily regiment..... don't want to get too skinny...... no, still doesn't sound right.
Liquid Vicoden is good stuff. I am careful and do try to limit my use, but it sure makes the tougher moments a little easier.
Up and down emotionally today for some reason. Family is here, that's good. Hair falling out isn't so good, but not a surprise and definitely temporary, so shouldn't be an issue. So thankful to have world class medical care and access to the best meds to help get through this, so that is a blessing. I can still get up, move around, take care of myself, so again, an amazing blessing and far better than it could be. And surrounded by love and friendship so no idea why the emotional roller coaster today......
Oh well, maybe just gearing up for next week. Hell week. But once its done, will be more than halfway. I cant wait........
Have a great weekend everyone..... we are so blessed in countless ways.
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Hey Kev: I just found some old pictures of you and me. I posted them on the blog...you will just crack-up. (Jet Skis, Scuba Diving, etc)
ReplyDeleteI am looking forward to seeing you on Chemo day! I hope Dan and I can be of some help..... Even if only in prayer and support that day and the next!
We love you more than you will ever realize, or not until you get to heaven.
I preach tomorrow at 2 Masses and my homily in many ways was inspired by you..... not the hell and damnation parts....(just Kidding)!
You Brother,
Pat
"Sept 10th - Goodness is basic...thank goodness"
ReplyDeleteThanks for post on this one Kevin, I am soooo glad you understand that it really help US when we can do something to help you. I enjoyed being with you on Wed on both of you Dr Appts, see you this Thursday Pal !! David D
Hey Kev, I Hope you have it a little easier than expected this week. You are doing a wonderful job at getting through this process. And as soon as you adopt the hairstyle that Tim and I have made famous for years at least the hair issue will be of no concern. Take Care, We all love you. Terry
ReplyDeleteYo Kev,
ReplyDeleteDirected to the "husky" pant section, sounds familiar! Nice insights into childhood trama? Hmmm, trying to keep the weight on by using Ensure through your feeding tube? Have you tried a nice German hefeweizen? I've never had an issue keeping the weight on when I've been drinking wheat beer. Better yet, I know you are a Guinness fan!
Half way is a good thing. World class medical care...good thing. Love you bro. Looking forward to seeing you this weekend.
Shave
Hi Kevin,
ReplyDeleteReading your positive dialogue is so inspiring. What a blessing that you are so loved - must be because you are a cherished and lovable guy. I know it must be incredibly tough but you will get through it - with all who love you cheering you on. I can't wait to the day when I hear that you've said "more ribs please"! They'll certainly beat that Ensure. Take care, Kevin. I'm thinking of you and praying for you.
Vicki
Hi Bro!
ReplyDeleteWell, it sounds like its time for Dan, Colin and I to take our trip to the Barbershop and instead of a "regular Boy's Haircut" we will need something a little "Shorter" like the ones we got the 1st day of "BootCamp!"
Let me know so I can arrange our "Support Cuts" and git r done!
-Mike